Home Garden Project Reset

The first week of a new job is complete! For many weeks up to now, I was so nervous. I kept wondering if I made the right decision. Was this lateral move step back for me? Should I have stayed in my old job until the right opportunity came around? I kept thinking that a promotion would happen if I stayed long enough and kept seeking the internal job board.

After completing my first week, I think I have made the right decision to move on. I appreciate that my new supervisor is transparent and detailed with the growth that could come out from my position as it is a newly created position. And that growth also comes with a promotion too (don’t forget pay bump) which made me very happy.

Leaving room for hobbies

The joke my former coworkers tell me is that I am going to have so much free time with a shorter commute at my new job that I might take up a hobby. They were not wrong. I love gardening and talking about plants with my friends, but it’s been so hard getting into it for the last few years because I would go home late from work leaving enough time to eat dinner, relax, and go to sleep. I would leave the weekends to doing all the things I need and want to do like chores, errands, shopping, dog walking, gym, and don’t forget my kid’s dance class! The weekends would leave me tired.

With little time to garden resulted in majority of the plants I brought in dying with the exception of Russian sage, blue fescues, and jasmines which require little to no water. I got a pink tabebuia tree last year and I almost gave up on it, but now there are loads of new leave. Also I got an olive tree a few months back and it’s been sprouting new leaves. I guess this is what happens when you find time to give plants care. I am literally reviving my home garden.

I just added a few more plants in the mix: a wildflower mix from seeds, another mix of flowers from bulbs, a tomato plant from my mom and sea thrift picked out by Lana. Last week we went to the gardening store to get a large terra cotta pot for the tomatoes. Lana loved the gardening store, she picked whatever she could reach and put it in the cart. I was worried that I would not be able to care for more plants so I made her choose one plant to take home so she chose sea thrift. Sorry daisies, but maybe another time.

I know there have been water concerns on the news but fear not! The water I use to water the plants is recycled water from washing the dishes. I use a siphon to get the water out into a large bucket and water the plants. In our backyard we have an irrigation system but it’s only for the jasmines since majority of the yard is turf. Also the watering needs for jasmine are low. Except for the tomato and the flower box, I would say the rest of the plants require little water when established.

The Next three weeks

Last week I shared that there is a likelihood my BILS would get evicted. Last Tuesday, my husband was very tired from work. He’s been doing a lot of overtime. One evening when was going back home from work, he was thinking “I’ve been working so much overtime and brother #2 stays at home does nothing all day. Why does he think it’s okay.” My husband just had it and decided to have a talk with both of his brothers to see what are they doing to become more independent and eventually move out.

BIL #1 works, but he does nothing to contribute to the house like cleaning the yard, a place where he spends a lot of his free time when he’s not at work or sleeping. I have to push him to pick the dog poop and blow the leaves, but it’s an ordeal. My husband asked BIL #1 one time if he’s done a cost analysis: how much would it cost to move out of the house, has he taken a good look at the rent and what comforts would he be willing to give up because chances he would be not be able to afford a 2-bedroom apartment like he hopes for with his current job. We were hoping at this point he could find a better job with the hazardous materials certification he earned more than a year ago. Side note: My husband paid for the BIL #1’s courses for that certification.

BIL #2 has been spoiled all throughout his life. He’s never worked a day in his life. Everyone in the family is always picking up after him. When he moved in with us, my husband wanted him to become more independent and even pick up a part-time job or volunteer but BIL #2 has always come up with excuses. After my husband did the intervention, nothing changed. Since I was not working last week, he continued to be a lounge lizard in the bedroom sleeping all day. Then when Saturday came around, he was out and about. He was lounging in the backyard and then he was “running errands.” I speculate this is because my husband was home all weekend. BIL #1 even tried appeasing my husband by offering him lunch which he never does.

This Wednesday when I came home from work, I found dog poop on the living room carpet. When BIL #2 came by, I asked him “did you not see that the living room carpet had dog poop?” He goes “I just woke up. I think it happened just now.” I said, “That’s BS, paresseux. How you would know it just happened just now if you just woke up?” Then he re-directs it saying maybe it happened this morning and I said, “that can’t be. I always let them outside at twice: first thing in the morning and before I leave the house.” And then he says, “well brother #1 came home around 5 PM as he usually does and he did let them out too. I think it just happened just now because it wasn’t there when I woke up at 10 AM getting something to eat.” It was like talking in circles because first he speculated one of the dogs pooped in the living in the morning and now he said he did not see it at 10 AM. I prosecuted him by asking him,”so you went to sleep something after 10 AM after you ate and you just woke up?” He said, “yes.” Then here comes the knockout I said, “well that’s the problem: you’re at home all day and you do nothing all day.”

He did not say anything after that. He couldn’t make the defense as he usually does by saying, “If I see a mess, then I pick it up” because we already know it is not true. He did pick up the poop, then a few minutes later he comes with paper towels cleaning the carpet. I told him that we have a carpet cleaner he could use so he does not have to waste so many paper towels and it could get the job quicker. I’m not sure if it was necessary to clean the carpet, but I did not protest.

Since then, BIL #2 been trying to appease me too. Yesterday, he was going to Aldi to get something for dinner and he asked me if I needed something. I told him I appreciate it, but I did not need anything. Later, he said he bought cookies and offered it to me. But again, I declined because I already ate and even had dessert. My husband has been out of town for work and I told him about it. He finds it funny because BIL #2 has never offered anything to us. But at this point I think he is genuinely concerned about getting the boot. Unfortunately buying his way in with box mac-and-cheese and cookies is not a viable option.

Tags: Weekend Coffee Share, Cellpic Sunday, The Changing Seasons,  #2022wotylinkparty

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Eat, Play, Live - my personal blog Buoyancy Blog Project - a blog about resilience

12 thoughts on “Home Garden Project Reset”

  1. I am so happy that you are happy with your new job! Since we spend som many hours every day at work it’s so important top feel good about what we do. Best of luck with your gardening project! It is awesome that you are using recycled water. Wonderful post!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am so glad that you had a good visit to the gardening store – and such fun that Lara got to pick up her very own plant! And I loved hearing about how you use your recycled washing up water. Loving Husband and I have talked about recycling the water from our Dryer – but we were concerned that maybe the residual soap particles might harm the plants – but if you are using dish washing water, that should be ok, right?

    Everytime I read about your home situation with your ILs, I can’t help but cringe and really feel for you. Being Asian is sometimes so challenging because of familial obligations & expectations. Rooting for you and sending you lots of positive energy!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Hopefully you enjoy your new job and also find time for new hobbies. I’m sorry about the situation with the BIL’s…sounds like you and your hubby have been more than patient and kind and hopefully some tough love will do the trick.

    Liked by 1 person

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