Where do we go from here on out?

Trigger warning: death, loss, grief

I’m not sure, to be honest. I’ve experienced a tragedy so deep that it’s breaking my heart. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever written.

Last night I lost my husband in an accident. Eight years married and 12 years together total ended just like that. It’s been so tough to process. Overnight I became a widow and a single mom. Heaven has gained an angel and he’s watching over me and Lana. I miss him so much.

I canceled my scheduled posts for the month. I’ll re-schedule them I feel ready. Right now I am in so much pain. I feel like I am in the eye of a tornado but everywhere is foggy.

Weekend Coffee Share

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Eat, Play, Live - my personal blog Buoyancy Blog Project - a blog about resilience

27 thoughts on “Where do we go from here on out?”

  1. My deepest condolences for your loss. I have been married for 6 years and can hardly comprehend the pain you must be enduring. This is one of my most dreaded fears – losing my beloved spouse. You are facing this with such strength and courage, and it is admirable that you wrote this blog post after everything that has happened. 🦋

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Hilary. I just needed this out as soon as it was fresh. I just didn’t see the point in waiting because afterward there’s the funeral that has to happen. I needed my thoughts candid as possible — no matter how “ugly” there are. It is the most awful experience.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Your thoughts are not “ugly” at all. Your posts are raw and vulnerable. I’ve been reading and re-reading your recent ones… been thinking of you and Lana. You’re incredibly strong and I think blogging is a really good outlet to write out your thoughts and feelings ✍️ The blogging community is a good, safe place for that 🦋

        Tbh I don’t understand why these terrible things happen to good people. There’s so much I don’t understand about the universe and life.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Dearest Julie and Lana,
    I’m so sorry I missed your news and am backtracking now. LIke everyone else here, I send you my heartfelt condolences. So hard when you had no warning. You are in my prayers and in my heart.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s okay, Rowena. I am also backtracking on comments. This weekend feels like it’s the first weekend I get to review and engage with the comments and blogs.


  3. Dear, dear Julie, I just read coffee share without knowing what happened. Accidents are so much harder to handle than long illnesses. I am so sorry. My heart is breaking for you.

    Liked by 1 person

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